YTSEJAM Digest 1267
Today's Topics:
1) DT clinic
by Jan van Huizen <aurora@wirehub.nl>
2) Frank Aresti
by Jan van Huizen <aurora@wirehub.nl>
3) fill in the blanks
by Archfates@aol.com
4) AOL chat
by DreamNDay@aol.com
5) Mail Item Format Warning
by "RESPONSE at IBMMAIL 02/17/96 - 20:10:22" <response@ibmmail.com>
6) Shame on me
by kretschmer@bdt.com (Jon Kretschmer)
7) Can this be true?
by augie@unix.asb.com (Heath)
8) Subconscious and Acoustic Dreams
by Bogie34@aol.com
9) A Change of Seasons EP Promos
by Bogie34@aol.com
10) whinos and other latino dancers on the boulevard of dreams
by WildKoba@aol.com
11) Norwegian black metal scene
by Matt Rosin <msr7146@tam2000.tamu.edu>
12) Saigon Kick and Extreme
by YoSammity@aol.com
13) Oh, a whole buttload of stuff...
by "Dr. Teeth" <GLYDE@VAX1.MANKATO.MSUS.EDU>
14) An Interesting Point...
by Bogie34@aol.com
15) Re: YTSEJAM digest 1266
by Ernesto Schnack <ernie@ns1.pananet.com>
16) Oh crap, not the bookworm again!!!!!
by rtgood@students.wisc.edu (ryan good)
17) Re: Can this be true?
by "Damon M. Fibraio" <s0067977@hawkmail.monmouth.edu>
18) WDAJU comments
by godfther@netcom.com
19) The Ytsejam Drinking Game!
by Scotch <anthem@virginia.edu>
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 20:48:16 +0100
From: Jan van Huizen <aurora@wirehub.nl>
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: DT clinic
Message-ID: <1.5.4b11.32.19960217194816.0067ca58@mail.wirehub.nl>
Hi,
Great news for the Dutch (and European) Ytsejammers : Mike & John P. will be
doing a clinic in Holland ! To be precise, the Slagwerkkrant (the leading
Dutch magazine for percussionists) will be organizing a clinic with Tama drums
and Ibanez guitars on the 19TH OF MARCH. It will be held at Willem II, Den
Bosch. I read this in the latest Aardschok.
Can any Dutch Ytsejammer (especially living in the Rotterdam area) who owns a
car and is planning to attend the clinic, please e-mail me ? You can also
contact me if you want more details on the clinic.
See you,
Aurora
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 20:50:51 +0100
From: Jan van Huizen <aurora@wirehub.nl>
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: Frank Aresti
Message-ID: <1.5.4b11.32.19960217195051.00683fa0@mail.wirehub.nl>
Hi,
Some other news : at the end of March Fates Warning will be recording their
forthcoming album. As for Frank Aresti (formely of FW) is in a new band called
ALL THAT IS. It seems they already recorded a demo which features Aresti
playing guitar (or course) and doing the lead vocals !!!
I'll keep you posted ... !
See you,
Aurora
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 14:52:56 -0500
From: Archfates@aol.com
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: fill in the blanks
Message-ID: <960217145255_325033038@mail06.mail.aol.com>
If anyone has the pre-IAW tape with Labrie / ACOS, or if your
a Sterling fan; Children of yesterday aires of tommorow what do
you reap ____ in sorrow,_______ faster and faster_____ prepared
by the master. Could someone please fill in the blanks, this sounds
trivial, but it's driving me nuts and my tape deck is getting tired.
This may have already been beaten to death, if so, soooooorrryyy!
please fill me in anyway.
Want to say hello to my Neighbors in CT. ytse Jim and Ryan E. ,
who both showed you can tell someone you dissagree with them
without being derogatory.
"Wars and temper tantrums are the makeshifts of
ignorance, regrets illuminate... to late. F.W. prelude to ruin.
Shu
Chin.
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 15:09:09 -0500
From: DreamNDay@aol.com
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: AOL chat
Message-ID: <960217150908_425020612@mail02.mail.aol.com>
OK everyone. The AOL chat was a bomb and I would like to give it another
shot. Anyone interested in an AOL chat please e-mail me personally with when
is the best date andtime for you to stay online for a while.
later--------------Brian
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 15:11:00 EST
From: "RESPONSE at IBMMAIL 02/17/96 - 20:10:22" <response@ibmmail.com>
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: Mail Item Format Warning
Message-ID: <199602172011.MAA14026@mindcrime.ax.com>
The mail item that you sent at 20:10:54 GMT on 17 Feb 1996 has been delivered.
However, it has been necessary to convert this item into a
format that is acceptable to the recipient, FITIPMOL at IBMMAIL.
Information beyond column 79 in the mail item will have been wrapped.
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 12:27:55 +0800
From: kretschmer@bdt.com (Jon Kretschmer)
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: Shame on me
Message-ID: <v01510104ad4b083d856b@[206.14.103.54]>
>"A fart on Thomas Putnam!" - John Proctor
>From: kristopher long <long16@matrix.newpaltz.edu>
The Crucible...You know, this could become a cool thread. Too bad it
doesnt have anything to do with DT...Lets see if the educated mass gets
this one.
"If you really want to hear about it, the first thing youll probably want
to know if where I was born, and what my lousy childhood was like, and how
my parents were occupied and all before they had me, and all that David
Copperfield kind of crap, but I dont feel like going into it, if you want
to know the truth."
Aw man, I made that too easy. Who said it, and what book?
And as for the lack of DT content, we are all educated people who love DT.
That will never be forgotten by anyone that reads the list. So why not
flex the grey matter a bit once and a while?
Allright folks, till next time.
And way to go Bahr. My order for antiquities is on the way once I can find
enough change in the seats of my car.
Jon
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 16:19:49 -0500
From: augie@unix.asb.com (Heath)
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: Can this be true?
Message-ID: <v01510100ad4bf57ac8a2@[165.254.128.70]>
>I can't believe this, my second post to the new ax.com server and
>I'm wasted again! I've had four shots of Three Wise Men, and that was
>about three too many... I can't even stand. In fact I've had to backspace
>about 94 times so far writing this message.
> News from the DT camp... nothing solid yet, just plans that are
>hoping to be made reality... this winter: Rush, with special guest Dream
>Theater!! Hey, it's nothing solid yet, nothing confirmable, so don't kill
>yourself if it dosen't happen. But! They both have albums coming out at
>the same time and our favourite progressive band would very much like it
>to happen. Let's hope for the best eh!!! Managements will be the deciding
>factors in this now.
I hope you weren't too wasted Mike. If this news is true, it would be the
greatest thing in the world. I just hope it wasn't something you thought
of while you were drunk. Just imagine DT and Rush together. I could, but
couldn't.
Heath Augustover
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 16:37:47 -0500
From: Bogie34@aol.com
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: Subconscious and Acoustic Dreams
Message-ID: <960217163746_224638752@emout06.mail.aol.com>
Is there anyone on the Jam that is interested in selling me a copy (hopefully
one of you has an extra copy lingering around) of Subconscious and Acoustic
Dreams? Serious inquiries should e-mail me at the address in the header. I
am willing to pay mucho dinero for these gems.
Bogie
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 16:38:00 -0500
From: Bogie34@aol.com
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: A Change of Seasons EP Promos
Message-ID: <960217163759_224638835@mail04.mail.aol.com>
This is for all of you DT collectors out there:
Did you know two versions of the ACOS EP promo exist? I just found this out
last week. Naturally, there is the promo version similar to the actual ACOS
EP release with the gold promo stamp on the booklet. However, I found a
version last week that didn't have a booklet and actually had a different CD
picture. It's a black disc that has "Dream Theater" written across the top
like their other relases. Under that it says "A Change of Seasons" in the
fancy writing that is used on the back of the release. Then, underneath the
hole, it mentions the titles of all the tracks. It's rather interesting.
The back of the CD case just has generic looking text that lists the songs
on the CD, plus a paragrah about us! (Different than in the release's
booklet) Here 'tis.
"Dream Theater fans know what buttons to push. For years, now, the group's
fans have been demanding to know when the band would finally lay down its
live cult classic 23 minute opus, "A Change of Seasons." The song, which has
become legendary among Dream Theater fans around the world, has only been
performed live by the band on two occasions; once in Germany and once in New
York City. Bootleg versions, however, have left fans hoping that one day the
group would sanction a release of the ethereal masterpiece.
Their patience will not go unrewarded. Due to the amazing amount of letters,
phone calls, and a massive fan-initiated campaign on the Internet that
flooded the record company with requests, the group hit the studio in May to
put together this compilation. "A Change of Seasons" features a studio
version of the epic title track, plus live material recorded at Ronnie
Scott's Jazz Club in London on January 31st of this year. That show saw the
group perform a plethora of cover songs dedicated to their idols, who include
Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, Elton John, Queen, and Genesis.
The group is also currently working on new material due for their next studio
album, due in the summer of 1996."
Sorry to bore those of you who did not find this excerpt interesting. I
posted it for those of you who need to have every DT collectible out there!
Bogie
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 17:14:15 -0500
From: WildKoba@aol.com
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: whinos and other latino dancers on the boulevard of dreams
Message-ID: <960217171415_325139165@emout09.mail.aol.com>
hello there.
a hello to the mojoman, and hoping that he recovers from his night out. and
"polluted as a pelican"?!?!?! wha' tha......
and mike bahr, jeez! that's 2 for you! but i must say i like that 3 wise men
thing. i gotta try that someday.
i tried drinking saki with my apartmentmate last week, and i almost died!
well, anyways, some questions;
1) what the f--- is with the "response at ibmmail" things that clutter the
jam?
2) about the cool music being played at msg (home of the greatest hockey team
ever, and a really good basketball team), i figured i'd contribute a tale. i
play(ed) in the binghamton university pep band for 2 years (small school, but
of putzes and our bball team blows). but i was asked to play keyboards and
guitar, and i met a drummer there who happened to have silmilar tastes as i
do. soooooo, it wasn't uncommon to go thru a bevy of tunes, including
elp- karn evil 9 (some parts of course, not all)
yes- heart of the sunrise
zeppelin- a quick meley of "ocean" into "heartbreaker."
zappa- montana (whipping post)
police- walking on the moon
and a lot of other cool things like that!
i didn't really do any dt (other thanwfs a few times) because i don't want to
risk butchering great music.
but that's that for the arena gig.
to scott daugherty, re: 1000 lawyers
ans: a good start.
just think, i might end up in law school!
well, bye bye for now.
love and kisses,
david the polluted pelican kobayashi
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 16:42:59 -0600 (CST)
From: Matt Rosin <msr7146@tam2000.tamu.edu>
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: Norwegian black metal scene
Message-ID: <Pine.SOL.3.91.960217163628.2655A-100000@tam2000.tamu.edu>
here's another death-metal fan, i couldn't agree more (i'm sorry but i
don't remember who wrote it) that there is a lot of great music coming
out of the norwegian black metal scene. unfortunately, the members of my
favorite such badn, emperor, are all in jail for church-burning, etc.
:( as for the paradise lost discussion, i don't think you can really
compare them to metallic, especially considering where they each come
from. metallica started out total break-neck-pace thrash with more
screaming vocals. paradise lost started out as a more traditional death
metal band, though they've always had more atmospheric elements, which
are much more emphasized in their music today. i personally like
paradise lost a LOT more than i like metallica, especially the use of the
lead guitar melodic elements instead of just for soloing. it's also much
more orchestral in arrangement style, not to mention the occasional use
of female vocals. ;) ok, i suppose i should stick in some dream theater
content . . . well, "mirror" is playing in my cd player right now.
there, that should do it. ;) until later.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
Matt Rosin * SURREALITY: ambient-experimental
PO Box 15315 * IMAGESCAPE: ambient-progressive metal
College Station, TX * Matt Rosin: vocals/synths/programming
77841-7315 * http://http.tamu.edu:8000/~msr7146/imagescape
msr7146@tam2000.tamu.edu * email: imagescape@tamu.edu
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 19:55:21 -0500
From: YoSammity@aol.com
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: Saigon Kick and Extreme
Message-ID: <960217195520_425190784@emout08.mail.aol.com>
To the guy who asked if there were any Extreme and/or Saigon Kick fans
here....
I'm a really big fan of both bands (no, not just the hit singles... all
albums... all songs).
What are your favorite albums of theirs?
Mine are both of their newest: Waiting for the Punchline and Devil in the
Details.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 19:07:14 -0600 (CST)
From: "Dr. Teeth" <GLYDE@VAX1.MANKATO.MSUS.EDU>
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: Oh, a whole buttload of stuff...
Message-ID: <01I1BW0CD22A0021Y2@VAX1.MANKATO.MSUS.EDU>
Hey all!
I'm feeling incredibly organized today, so all my topics have a little "*" in
front of them. Good, no?
* Recently someone was saying that DT never was invited to Letterman's show and
it was instead King Crimson that was booted. Well, I distinctly remember the
reaction on the 'Jam to KC's appearance on that show. They played "Dinosaur"
and a lot of people who didn't know about KC weren't impressed. But my point
is that KC did indeed appear on Dave's show. I still maintain that DT was
stiffed by the show and was never allowed to perform about a year ago...
(Note: This has nothing to do with the recent bombardment of e-mail to The Late
Show to get the boys on...)
* Did anyone on the list ever get to go to that Molson Ice concert up in
Tachtin-upchuk, Anarctica where Metallica performed for the first time in
years? This was several months ago of course. (Actually I'm assuming this is
the first time in years, but I could be wrong...) Did anyone catch the
setlist? Was any new stuff played? Any new direction they might be going in?
* Extreme is a really friggin good band. I have Pornograffitti and just got
III Sides. Both of which are immaculate! Anyway, what are some opinions about
their self-titled release and their newest one? Should I stop while I'm ahead?
E-mail me privately on this one...
* There hasn't been a whole lot of 'Jam support for the guy that's been screwed
by Al Balkiweitz(sp?) lately... I mean, you'd think Al would at least contact
the guy asking him to quit defacing his name on the net, but the defacement
goes on and on. Hey, if Al doesn't have a conscience or care about his
reputation, then so be it I guess. This guy's just making it very obvious to
all of us that Al really can't be trusted. One of the few Ytsejammers I guess.
What would you do if you've been screwed over by someone for over a year? Sit
back and let it happen? I think this public defamation is appropriate,
especially if Al can't be contacted directly...
* Is this list truly unmoderated now? I've been seeing some sigs snipped and
paragraphs answered before they were asked, etc. Nothing too big or noticable,
but it's there. I just hope it just chills and doesn't increase...
* Recently I've been able to get my grubby little hands on Tool's recent New
Year's concert bootleg-tape. The setlist is as follows...
1. Intro/Stink Fist *
2. Bottom
3. Push It * (A cover of the Salt n Peppa song? Perhaps...)
4. Sober
5. Half Empty * (A song written by their new bassist, Justin Chancellor)
6. Prison Sex
7. Aenema *
8. Eulogy *
Songs with an asterisk are new songs slated to be on their new album which
doesn't have a release date yet, but it'll be this year. The 'Jam's been so
good to me so I'm going to do it a good deed and offer a free dub of this
concert for anyone who's interested. I'd rate the sound quality as an "8" for
most of it. E-mail me at glyde@vax1.mankato.msus.edu for more info.
That's about it, kids. Remember to brush!
Dr. Teeth
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 22:12:13 -0500
From: Bogie34@aol.com
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: An Interesting Point...
Message-ID: <960217221212_224820299@mail06.mail.aol.com>
Hey, is it just me or do Charlie Dominici's vocals on the Ytse Jam on WDADU
sound really good? :D
Bogie
P.S. I don't think James sounded that good on Erotomania though. IMHO!
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 18 Feb 96 03:20:13 +0000 (GMT)
From: Ernesto Schnack <ernie@ns1.pananet.com>
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: Re: YTSEJAM digest 1266
Message-ID: <199602180317.TAA17867@mindcrime.ax.com>
>the live EP LatTheM, during TheKHand, just after singing =91=92... that=
> caused
>this mourning. Crossing over...=92=92 James yells us a beautiful Labrieish=
> cry.
>And I am sure he DOES say something, he is not just yelling out loud. So
>what the hell does he say??!?! I would like to know...
He screams: 'OVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'
>"Music's for you and me, not the fucking industry. You try to tell us
>what is cool, but you see we come from different school. It only matters
>what you say, not the fucking games you play."
>
>Can anyone guess where these lyrics come from?
>
'Business'-Biohazard....cool:)
>Hey, I know this has nothing to do with DT but it's killing me. The group
>Suicidal Tendencies broke up last year and I was wondering if anyone
I had no idea... that's very depressing...:( at least they finished w/ a
very violent album...:)
>
>
>With all this talk about the possible sex-symbolism of DT I've just gotta say
>that James Labrie looks alot like David Hasselhoff (c'mon, I know you all
so very true... especially in the TTT video...IMO he's got David's eyes...
a toned down version of Leno's chin.... and Fabio's hair...HA hAHA HAAHAHA
>
> News from the DT camp... nothing solid yet, just plans that are
>hoping to be made reality... this winter: Rush, with special guest Dream
>Theater!! Hey, it's nothing solid yet, nothing confirmable, so don't kill
>
Could it be... a dream come true?
>
PROCRASTINATION: It's a way of life!
This message brought to you by the PTP foundation(Proud to Procrastinate). A
non- profit organization dedicated to waiting for tomorrow to support
procrastination.
Ernie ernie@mail.pananet.com
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 21:53:04 -0600
From: rtgood@students.wisc.edu (ryan good)
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: Oh crap, not the bookworm again!!!!!
Message-ID: <199602180353.VAA111907@audumla.students.wisc.edu>
Yes, I know. I've got one more VERY SMALL plea for cooperation.
I'm going for the throat this time. You all know that I'm working on my
paper "Progressive Rock Vs. The Radio Industry" with a never ending hope of
understanding why prog rock remains "underground." Thanks to all who have
replied, the response was excellent, but you know, the more, the merrier,
right?
Now, for the clincher. Does anyone out in Ytse-Land have e-mail
addresses of progressive rock record labels?? I've got Metal Blade's
(mtlbldrcds@aol.com, featuring Fates Warning, Thought Industry, Atheist,
Anacrusis....) and Magna Carta's (magcart@aol.com, featuring Cairo, Enchant,
Shadow Gallery, Magellan, etc....). How about EastWest/Electra's, so I can
get into the mind's of those at Dream Theater's label, or maybe, well...
Another question: What other primary Progressive Rock record labels are out
there? Remember, send responses to **rtgood@students.wisc.edu**
1) E-Mail addresses of Prog Rock labels
2) names of Prog Rock labels.
No, I thank you. And again, I thank you.
N.P: Auditory Imagery, "Blizzard."
___________
"When temptation brings me to my knees, and I lay here drained of strength,
show me kindness, show me beauty, show me truth." - Dream Theater
Ryan T. Good
rtgood@students.wisc.edu
1-608-264-2268
Madison Student Radio - Music Stapher
Progressive Rock/Metal
"Just the Heavy Stuff, Please."
-Yours Truly
The Next Sentence is True.
The Last Sentence is False.
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 96 22:58:17 EST
From: "Damon M. Fibraio" <s0067977@hawkmail.monmouth.edu>
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: Re: Can this be true?
Message-ID: <9602180358.AA29747@hawkmail.monmouth.edu>
Dream Theater and Rush in the same arena. I know it's not confirmed or even
could be completely false, but I would kill mass amounts of people to go to
this show, and I'd have a continuous orgasm in my seat, and you could quote
me on it, because I know some others who would be blowing loads or whatever
the equvalent is. So, Y-jammers, pray your asses off, because this would be
the ultimate show ever. I have to stop thinking about it or I may have to
change my underware.
------------------------------
Date: Sat, 17 Feb 1996 22:05:44 +0000
From: godfther@netcom.com
To: ytsejam@ax.com
Subject: WDAJU comments
Message-ID: <199602180402.UAA21818@netcom10.netcom.com>
I received When Dream and James Unite #395 last Wednesday, and I
am VERY impressed. I've been listening to it nonstop for these
past few days. I really never got to liking WDADU just because of
Dominici. With James at the helm, it gives the songs so much more.
My favorite songs on there are Only a Matter of Time and the To Live
Forever/Moonbubbles/Showdown track. It never fails to get me moving
in the morning.. =) All the tracks are VERY clear except for one. A
HUGE thanks to Mike Bahr for a great disc. It's almost like a whole
new DT CD, so I'm sure it will stay in the player for um, forever..
I still think the name of it should have been When Dream and James
Unite, but hey, I can't have everything.. heh
`:.___________________________________________________________.:'
| Samsonite, Web Page Designer |
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`---------------------------------------------------------------'
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 18 Feb 1996 00:18:24 -0500
From: Scotch <anthem@virginia.edu>
To: The Booze Crew <ytsejam@ax.com>
Subject: The Ytsejam Drinking Game!
Message-ID: <v01540b04ad4c2aeb91b1@bootp-234-126.bootp.virginia.edu>
Yo homies,
While reading the increasing number of PWI's (posting while intoxicated) on
the 'jam, it occurred to me that a whole new dimension of enjoyment could
be added to the already Fun and Exciting world of the Ytsejam Mailing List
with the help of some behavioral modification beverage consumption. So,
without further ado, I humbly present the Ytsejam Drinking Game. [Caution,
long post, may or may not be worth it]
The Ytsejam Drinking Game
Disclaimer:
This is a game. This is only a game. If using alcoholic beverages, do not
drive. For safety reasons, do not operate heavy machinery. Do not attempt
to play the instrumental part of Metropolis, on any instrument. And do not
listen to any of the Charlie Dominici songs, or you may vomit heavily.
Instructions:
Take a deep breath, buckle down and let the Ytsejams pile up in your
mailbox for a indeterminate amount of time. Place drinks, alcoholic or
not, within easy reach. Read the 'jams, drinking when instructed to
according to the following rules. In case of confusion over whether or not
to drink, always err on the side of drinking. Enjoy your experience...!
[Bonus suggestion: have a bunch of friends over, mix various drinks, and
have a PROGRESSIVE. Get it...?]
Take a sip if...
someone prefaces their message with "This is my first post, so bear with
me.." (2 sips if you immediately hate the person upon hearing this)
someone says "[lurk mode off]"
someone uses "take the time" in a sentence (the most beaten-to-death DT
cliche ever)
someone's quote is longer than their response
someone's sig is longer than their message
someone posts an "unsubscribe" request (2 sips if they give some lame
excuse or irate complaint)
someone voices their bitter, condescending contempt for today's popular music
someone goes through an entire previous 'jam, extracts a series of
quotes, and posts smartass remarks after each one
someone says "DT RULZ!!" (additional sip for each exclamation point)
it's painfully, head-shakingly obvious that someone has not read the FAQ
you thought Ytse and Jam were funny the first time but got old fast (lose
a turn if you never got it in the first place)
someone pines for Kevin Moore
someone wonders how Derek will fit into the band
someone expresses their utter hatred for David Prater and his fucking
drum triggers
you snicker every time you hear the name "Jeff Chew"
you snicker every time you hear the name "Hairball"
Ben Laussade's cutesy sig ceases to be funny after the 20th time you've
seen it
Damon Fibraio mentions that he's blind
someone asks how to get Acoustic Dreams
you find yourself laughing your ass off at the AOLers
someone uses a DT lyric that you love in their sig and it sounds
pretentious and dumb out of context
someone posts that they "finally figured out" the samples at the end of SDV
someone asks how to pronounce "ytsejam"
someone attempts to flamebait (writing a deliberately harsh, acidic
message, then saying "flame me if if you want" or "flames will be ignored")
some clueless soul posts thinking he's writing directly to DT
Take a gulp if...
someone uses the prefix "ytse-" on anything
someone posts more than 5 times in a row (Laussade and Fibraio excluded)
someone posts misheard lyrics that are better than the originals
Bafu writes a serious, provocative, eloquent post (2 gulps if you
actually take it seriously)
one of the foreign 'jammers totally butchers the English language
someone goes through a DT song in minutes and seconds, analyzing each part
the quote carets (>) get more than 4 levels deep
someone fakes a message from a DT member (additional gulp for each moron
who falls for it)
a non-musician tries to explain why they love DT
someone appends their name with their instrument and band name
someone refers to Bafu as "Steve"
an AOL message shows up twice or more
you enjoy Ben Laussade's weird posts but are afraid to meet him
someone writes an entire message in lower-case
someone writes an entire message in upper-case
someone writes an entire message in alternating upper and lower-case
Mike Bahr imparts some Timeless Wisdom
Mike Bahr provides some handy cocktail recipes
Mike Bahr tells a joke (2 gulps if it's racist)
you can't fucking stand those little smileys
someone thinks up a corny email name alias and signs their emails with it
(additional gulp for every word in between "David" and "Kobayashi")
the Visual Music thread ever returns
someone tries to start a letter-writing campaign
someone fantasizes about DT becoming famous
someone agonizes about DT becoming famous
you get sore fingers from hammering "page down" over Trey Allen's Ytsecon
updates and those Ytsejam hat offers
someone fawns all over Bafu (2 gulps if you are Bafu)
someone bitches about how bad the 'jam is
someone fills their post with arcane musical terminology (2 gulps if they
actually know what thy're talking about)
someone accuses another 'jammer of racism/fascism/liking rap
someone flies into a blind fury when someone insinuates that DT are fallible
Chug your entire drink if...
someone refers to Charlie Dominici as "Chuck D"
someone abbreviates "Awake"
any romances develop on the 'jam
you can correctly spell "Borzilleri," "Battaglia," and "Balkiewicz" (2
chugs if you can pronounce them too)
you gave up in junior high the things that Mike Bahr now collects
someone actually puts forth the effort to write "Dream Theater" instead
of "DT"
someone reposts the entire fucking 'jam (pour everything down the drain
if you're that someone)
you don't give a rat's ass about DT hats, shirts, stickers, or transcriptions
a letter-writing campaign actually works (2 chugs if it results in an album)
Bafu reuses the "YOU'RE THE MERCY FUCK" passage
someone starts another poll (2 chugs if Ken Bibb frantically urges you to
respond by by private email)
you start pronouncing DT abbreviations phonetically (i.e. ACOS, WDADU,
UAGM, LSOAD, TOWHTSTS)
you own what is currently in Neil Gallup's CD player
Graham Borland uses the words "bloody," "arse," or "buggered" (down a
pint of bitter if in the same sentence)
DT music has ever made you cry
someone analyzes a DT song in terms of a literary work (2 chugs if it
sounds pathetically silly)
you singlehandedly manage to piss off everyone on the 'jam
you try to piss off everyone on the 'jam but instead fall flat
you get the feeling that some 'jammers are blowing their family fortunes
on guitar gear
Mike Bahr sounds like your dad (start two-fisting if he IS your dad)
Drink everything in sight if...
Warren in Oregon gets his fan club stuff
Al Balkiewicz sends Patricia her tapes
SloppyJoe69 comes back
DT makes Metropolis Part 3
the FBI busts Jeremy Haynes/Susan Moscardini (start bonging if they let
us decide the punishment)
Eddie Vedder sings backup on the new album
DT incorporates gangsta rap into their next album
you use DT lyrics as pick-up lines-- and they work
Izzy Stradlin joins DT
a member of DT actually posts (drink straight, no chaser, if he's
actually believed to be who he is)
a 'jam contains ALL DT content
a 'jam contains NO DT content
any marriages develop on the 'jam (go to the store for more if it's Bafu
and Ben)
you finally realize that DT occupies a greater part of your life than
personal hygiene, human contact, and career fulfillment... AND YOU DON'T
GIVE A FLYING FUCK.
This game to be followed by the Rush urination game, the Blind Melon
projectile vomiting marathon, and the Tori Amos hangover therapy.
Scott Herman.
anthem@virginia.edu
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End of YTSEJAM Digest 1267
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This archive was generated by hypermail 2b30 : Thu Apr 01 2004 - 17:55:15 EST