YTSEJAM Digest 4895
Today's Topics:
1) Maybe... when the list moves...
by "Mattymo@mattymo.com" <mattymo@mattymo.com>
2) God, It's all happening!
by Kurt Hampton <eernewe1@gnofn.org>
3) Re: YTSEJAM digest 4894
by DrummerEsh@aol.com
4) Yet another $10 off at CDNow
by "Trevor W. Hoit" <TrevorW@ms.kallback.com>
5) Iron Maiden / Question for any English 'jammer
by Big Swifty <swifty@auburn.net>
6) star wars abridged script
by "Trevor W. Hoit" <TrevorW@ms.kallback.com>
7) Planet X
by Luke Bateup <slslb@winshop.com.au>
8) Savatage "Holding Back The Storm"
by "Volodya" <oanrec@club-internet.fr>
9) Lots of free music
by "Gallop, Neil" <nga@software-ag.de>
10) Scarred Records
by AlexandroTalamini <Alexandro@Boticario.com.br>
11) help please?
by "Sasha C." <sasa.cabaravdic@pu.tel.hr>
12) Hair metal returns to Cincinnati!!!!!!!
by John Parks <jpyyz@yahoo.com>
13) Re: Show me the music
by Jon Parmet <jon@parmetpc.volpe.dot.gov>
14) Re: Hair metal returns to Cincinnati!!!!!!!
by Frank Benenati <fmb@frontierlogic.com>
15) Iron Maiden News - NDTC
by "Gilberto Bressan Junior" <gbressanjr@sti.com.br>
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: Wed, 9 Jun 1999 23:49:28 -0500
From: "Mattymo@mattymo.com" <mattymo@mattymo.com>
To: <ytsejam@axnet.net>
Subject: Maybe... when the list moves...
Message-ID: <003601beb2fc$a8e909e0$fc19fea9@mattymo>
when one would sub to the new list when skadz get it all setup... the
majordomo can send out some of the groundrules... like
"no top XX lists"
"no surveys"
"no pissing off ptacek" <G>
"questions about audio... ask al"
or stuff like that
:-)
np: ST Lights Camera Revolution
~Matt
moshpit.mattymo.com ~~~WORT Metal
mattymo.com ~~~~my homepage
mattymo@mattymo.com
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 00:12:30 -0500 (CDT)
From: Kurt Hampton <eernewe1@gnofn.org>
To: Multiple recipients of list <ytsejam@axnet.net>
Subject: God, It's all happening!
Message-ID: <Pine.GSO.3.95.990529152358.16338A-100000@sparkie.gnofn.org>
yo,
Just been to the megadeth site. Risk is slated for Aug.31
Hmm... New Def Leppard now, LTE2 in a week, new Queensryche Sept 14th, DT
in October, It's going to be a VERY busy fall indeed!
Kurt
******~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~****** @----'--,--- ******~~~~~~~~~~~~~~******
"I remember Now"
"Rodney King, what the hell is that supposed to mean? He's that guy."
Airheads
************************************************************************
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 01:41:22 EDT
From: DrummerEsh@aol.com
To: ytsejam@axnet.net
Subject: Re: YTSEJAM digest 4894
Message-ID: <aab896e3.2490aa02@aol.com>
In a message dated 6/9/99 8:22:43 PM Pacific Daylight Time, ytsejam@ax.com
writes:
<< Are you high? >>
Im always high!!!
-Esh
http://www.phosphenes.com
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 00:56:31 -0700
From: "Trevor W. Hoit" <TrevorW@ms.kallback.com>
To: "'John'" <infosolu@oz.net>, "'Steve-burien prog guy'" <pachin1046@aol.com>,
Subject: Yet another $10 off at CDNow
Message-ID: <E04FDFCFDC87D21194D300A0C9D4BAFA0F4305@ms.kallback.com>
http://cdnow.com/from=red:x:cdn:mm
expires 6/23
These guys have made no money off me!!!
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 02:57:46 -0500
From: Big Swifty <swifty@auburn.net>
To: ytsejam@axnet.net
Subject: Iron Maiden / Question for any English 'jammer
Message-ID: <375F6FFA.2DC5@auburn.net>
I'm currently reading "Run To The Hills," a biography of Iron Maiden.
This is one fantastic book. I found it a Books A Thousa...er, Books A
Million while browsing. It's a great book written by Mick Wall, who
might be a recognizable name to someone more Maiden-educated than
myself.
I've got a question for any English 'jammer who cares enough to help me
out. Several times in the book, a member of Maiden will refer to someone
as a "punter." What is a punter? I'm completely in the dark here.
Any Maiden fan will surely enjoy this book. I'm about two hundred pages
into it, and Bruce has just joined the band :) Feels kind of current, in
a strange way :)
Take care, and thanks in advance,
Mark Peters
swifty@auburn.net
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 01:34:23 -0700
From: "Trevor W. Hoit" <TrevorW@ms.kallback.com>
To: "'Ytsejam'" <ytsejam@axnet.net>, "'Freaks'" <freaks@torchsong.com>
Subject: star wars abridged script
Message-ID: <E04FDFCFDC87D21194D300A0C9D4BAFA0F4309@ms.kallback.com>
The following is a humerous version of The Phantom Menace.
It's kinda long and gives away the story, so if you haven't seen
it, delete now.
STAR WARS: THE PHANTOM MENACE: THE ABRIDGED SCRIPT
By Rod Hilton
FADE IN:
INT. SPACESHIP
LIAM NEESON: It is vitally important we enter trade negotiations with the
federation.
EWAN MCGREGOR: I agree. This one planet and how it trades with other
planets is certainly an important enough topic to be the entire plot of a
Star Wars film.
INT. SPACESHIP - MAIN DECK
EVIL ALIEN: Werr. What wirr we do now? My evil, obviousry Asian race must
prevair. I wirr not face de Jedi. Send de droid.
INT. SPACESHIP - BACK TO THE JEDI
A droid enters.
LIAM NEESON: I sense a disturbance in the force.
EWAN MCGREGOR: Well, shit.
Suddenly, numerous pieces of CGI enter and begin attacking the Jedi. The
Jedi use the high concentration of midichlorians in their bodies to use the
force to destroy the CGI. They run outside.
EXT. NABOO
They run until they smack into some more CGI.
JAR JAR: Who might you be?
LIAM NEESON: (staring in the general direction of Jar Jar, but not really
staring at him) I am a Jedi. There are bad things coming. Take me to your
homeland.
JAR JAR: I see. That is quite interesting. I will guide you to the land
from which I have come.
Suddenly, GEORGE LUCAS realizes the Jar Jar toys aren't selling well enough.
JAR JAR (cont'd) Oh! Meesa sorry! Meesa ment to saysa: Weesa can go back
to Jamaica mon, okeyday?
EWAN MCGREGOR: (staring at something right above Jar Jar) Good. Do you have
a hotel room for me and Liam? We have..uh..Jedi business to attend to.
JAR JAR: Weesa can smokesa some ganja, mon.
AUDIENCE: Die. Die, Jar Jar. Nobody likes you.
INT. SPACESHIP - MAIN DECK
The queen appears over some kind of thing which appears to be better in
technology than the kinds of things in the original trilogy.
NATALIE PORTMAN: I am the queen. You've gone too far this time. I will tell
the senate and you will be in a lot of trouble.
EVIL ALIEN: I'm so sorry, Amidala.
NATALIE PORTMAN: No, no, I'm Padme now.
EVIL ALIEN: I thought when in the makeup, you were the queen.
NATALIE PORTMAN: No, I'm whoever is playing the queen at the time. The
voice changes don't help you figure this out?
EVIL ALIEN: Stop trying to confoose me! Droids, capture the queen.. or
Padme.. er.. just capture everyone!
LIAM and EWAN and, fuck, JAR JAR too take NATALIE PORTMAN and other members
of her staff onto a ship and they escape. They go to Tatooine.
INT. TATOOINE - SOME SHOP WHERE JAKE LLOYD IS HELD SLAVE
JAKE LLOYD: Hi there! Golly I'm cute.
NATALIE PORTMAN: You certainly are, little boy.
JAKE LLOYD: I'm the only one disturbed by the fact that I'm gonna bone you
in episode two?
LIAM NEESON: Jake, I need you to have a pod race so I can get the parts I
need and free you.
JAKE'S MOM: No, I won't allow him to pod race. He'll get hurt. (pause) Ok,
I will. Nevermind. Good luck.
They pod race. It looks really COOL.
GEORGE LUCAS: (attempting subtlety) Oh! Look! There's a video game of
this scene... uh.. buy it! Hey, I had to sacrifice a part of my grand
vision for these movies to include a part that could be turned into a game,
so buy it or I'll do it even more in episode 2.
JAKE wins! He has to leave his mother, which will become very important in
the next movie. He also has to leave his protocol droid, THREEPIO.
AUDIENCE: He built C-3PO? Why wasn't this ever mentioned in the original
trilogy?
GEORGE LUCAS: Because I just made it up. Speaking of stuff I'm just making
up, how do you like the midichlorian bullshit I pulled out of my ass?
They all get into their ship and go to Coruscant.
INT. CORUSCANT - JEDI COUNCIL
LIAM NEESON: I want to train this boy.
YODA: Nope. Sorry. Too old the boy is. Clouded his future seems. Vague my
worries are.
LIAM NEESON: Well, he is the chosen one. He will bring balance to the
force. I'm training him.
SAMUEL L. JACKSON: Yoda told you no, muthafucka. What the fuck is wrong
with you, bitchass? I'll fuckin' kill you! I'm gonna be a fuckin bad ass in
the next two fuckin movies, you know. My toy has a fuckin lightsaber.
LIAM NEESON: I'm going to go over your head and train him myself, then. So
there.
He exits.
INT. GALACTIC SENATE MEETING
IAN MCDIARMID: Damn I'm evil.
Suddenly, we see E.T! This does not make the film HYPER- CUTESEY like
Return of the Jedi, but CLEVER.
EXT. NABOO
NATALIE PORTMAN: I am either the queen or Padme now. Regardless, your
cheesy-looking race of annoying, unrealistic characters need to ally with
our badly acting race of creatures so we can capture this one guy.
BOSS NASS: One guy? The climax of this film revolves entirely around us
capturing one, pretty insignificant guy? Doesn't that make this whole thing
kinda pointless?
NATALIE PORTMAN: No more pointless than the fact that this entire film
revolves around taxes on trade and the cutting off of one, pathetic little
planet half-filled with annoying creatures.
They go after the bad guy or whatever. Who cares?
Finally DARTH MAUL shows up for a prolonged fight sequence. Darth wears
black boots, a black cloak, black shirt, has a red lightsaber, wears red and
black face paint, and has horns. He is EVIL.
Meanwhile, the Naboo people go after this one insignificant guy and we
really don't care.
Meanwhile, the Gungans go against a bunch of droids and we really don't care
except we want the Gungans to die.
Meanwhile, Anakin takes off into space to join the space-battle, which is
mostly over by the time he arrives. We care a little bit.
INT. SOME KIND OF THINGY WITH SOME RED FORCE FIELDS
MAUL, LIAM, and EWAN all have a huge lightsaber battle which has had a lot
of effort put into the choreography and is thousands of times better than
any other lightsaber battle in a Star Wars film.
AUDIENCE: Whoa! This is really cool!
Suddenly, we go back to one of the other three stupid battles going on at
the time. Eventually, we return to the good one.
DARTH MAUL: (menacing as hell) Grrr.
Eventually, MAUL stabs LIAM, which is very surprising, especially to those
of us who bought the film score which has a song whose title gives away the
ending. He then kicks EWAN into a shaft. EWAN grabs onto something on the
side and holds on for dear life.
EWAN MCGREGOR: Well, you certainly are an experienced fighter and there is
little question you could kick pretty much anyone's ass.
DARTH MAUL (cont'd): Muahahahaha.
Slowly, EWAN uses the force to grab LIAM'S lightsaber, jump up out of the
shaft, over MAUL, press the button on the saber, and slice MAUL in half
while MAUL stands there like an idiot and does nothing at all. He dies.
EXT. SPACE
JAKE LLOYD: Whoaaaaa! I'm in space! Now this is pod racing! Yipee! Uh oh!
Man, I'm so cute.
JAKE goes into a hangar, where the main reactor for the ship is kept. He
accidentally blows it to SHIT.
JAKE LLOYD (cont'd): Uh oh! I better leave! Let's leave Artoo!
They exit quickly. The ship explodes, which stops all the droids and just
makes everything great, because it's always enjoyable when a serious
conflict is resolved with a slapstick accident.
EXT. THE STREETS OF NABOO
The Gungans are dancing and such, still alive. A huge party ensues.
AUDIENCE: Wow! Watching this party and all this celebration has convinced
me that the tiny, pathetic problem that has been taken care of is actually
really significant! Hooray!
Suddenly, the AUDIENCE realizes that behind all the mindless celebration and
kiddie cartoon bullshit, what actually happened was the future-emperor has
actually manipulated everything, come into great power, and that one tiny
problem has actually been resolved, but thousands more have been created.
GEORGE LUCAS: Three years, suckers. I'd make them come out sooner, but I
work very hard on my films, as I am an independent filmmaker due to my
disgust with Hollywood's commercialism. Now go buy some Star Wars toys!
END
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 07:56:44 +1000
From: Luke Bateup <slslb@winshop.com.au>
To: ytsejam <ytsejam@axnet.net>
Subject: Planet X
Message-ID: <375EE31C.235349C3@winshop.com.au>
Hello,
After seeing a Virgil Donati clinic here in Australia not so long ago
and reading the praises for Planet X here on the jam, I just can't wait
for CDNow to get the pre-order thing going. If someone can get their
hands on a copy of the CD can they please email me as I would be more
than willing to send them a money order so they can purchase it for me.
Cheers,
Luke.
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 13:17:32 +0200
From: "Volodya" <oanrec@club-internet.fr>
To: <ytsejam@axnet.net>
Subject: Savatage "Holding Back The Storm"
Message-ID: <000101beb332$d605e5c0$7ca424c3@default>
Hello,
Follow the link below to check out the double CD live set from Savatage
called "Holding Back The Strom". On the site you will find all the necessary
info such as the track-listing, cover artwork and two songs in MP3 format :
"Sirens" and the acoustic version of "Not What You See".
Take care,
Volodya.
___________________________________________________
OPEN ALL NIGHT [ OAN ] RECORDS
Check out Gamma Ray / Iron Savior double CD live set
http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Mezzanine/9326/oan.htm
e-mail: oanrec@club-internet.fr
ICQ number: 19517742
___________________________________________________
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 13:53:39 +0200
From: "Gallop, Neil" <nga@software-ag.de>
To: "'ytsejam@ax.com'" <ytsejam@axnet.net>
Subject: Lots of free music
Message-ID: <005355AD0596D211B4F30000F81B0D32B85A15@daemsg01.software-ag.de>
Hi all
I often see questions here on the list asking how band
ABC or band XYZ sounds. Well here's a site that has lots
of tracks by lots of bands that are often mentioned
here, including the following:
Iced Earth
Skinlab
Lacuna Coil
The Gatehring
Blind Guardian
Angra
Opeth
Theatre Of Tragedy
Moonspell
Tiamat
Alastis
Samael
Sentenced
Eyehategod
Strapping Young Lad
Just point you browser at the following address and off
you go http://www.centurymedia.com/framers/in_audio.cfm
Lots of stuff for everybody and some of my personal
favourites. Have fun downloading.
Oh, and more reviews on the way soon, including the
amazing album "Ringmaster" by Las Cruces - pure doom
and nothing to do with Tolkien.
stay safe and happy listening
Neil Gallop (neil.gallop@softwareag.com)
Currently playing: Paradise Lost - Host
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 09:05:04 -0300
From: AlexandroTalamini <Alexandro@Boticario.com.br>
To: "'ytsejam@ax.com'" <ytsejam@axnet.net>
Subject: Scarred Records
Message-ID: <CB9A835262C6D1118B3B00805FEA2A710162B03F@CORREIO>
Hi all,
Does anybody knows what's happening to Scarred Records's web page?? I've
been trying to log on to it for over a week and nothing.
Alex
Curitiba, Brazil
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 15:32:06 +0200
From: "Sasha C." <sasa.cabaravdic@pu.tel.hr>
To: "Ytsejam Mailing List" <ytsejam@axnet.net>
Subject: help please?
Message-ID: <000701beb345$b0d643e0$1be91dc3@sasa>
hi!
i was just wondering if anyone knows where could i buy Dream Theater
t-shirts on-line. Actually i was at the music store and asked the salesman
if he could get me a Dream Theater "Awake" t-shirt. And he said that he can
only get me Touring into infinity t-shirt. and i don`t even know what does
it look like? so where could i find a picture of it? i just spend an hour
surfing around looking for that... had no luck.
thanx in advance
"Lifting shadows off a dream
Once broken
She can turn a drop of water
Into an ocean..."
John Myung of Dream Theater
["Lifting Shadows Off A Dream"]
sasa.cabaravdic@pu.tel.hr
ICQ UIN - 6098813
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 07:27:20 -0700 (PDT)
From: John Parks <jpyyz@yahoo.com>
To: ytsejam dream theater <ytsejam@axnet.net>
Subject: Hair metal returns to Cincinnati!!!!!!!
Message-ID: <19990610142720.19509.rocketmail@web120.yahoomail.com>
Well last night I was able to witness something I never
ever thought I would get to see. L.A. Guns, Great White,
Ratt and Poison all on the same bill. And ya know what...?
The Freekin rocked Riverbend (a great outdoor venue btw)
Highlights of the show: Getting to see the song Once Bitten
Twice Shy performed live, Ratt in general, C.C. Deville (
some of you might not think he is that great of a guitarist
but he really knows how to work a crowd)
The icing on the cake though came from two of the most
perfect women dancing in the row right in front my friend
and I. All my boyhood fantasies came to life last night,
seeing two chicks strip (ok so they didn't really strip but
it was close enough) to the music of Poison. All hail the
return of Hair Metal!!!
NP: Jewel-Spirit
===
John Parks
jpyyz@yahoo.com
Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former. -Albert Einstein-
_________________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Get your free @yahoo.com address at http://mail.yahoo.com
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 14:34:35 +0000
From: Jon Parmet <jon@parmetpc.volpe.dot.gov>
To: ytsejam@axnet.net
Subject: Re: Show me the music
Message-ID: <375FCCFB.4DA6@parmetpc.volpe.dot.gov>
Andrew wrote:
> DTC: I just received LTE in the mail and I only have ONE complaint: It's
> too SHORT! Does anybody else agree here? [...]
I felt the same way about Age Of Impact. And that one doesn't have an
equvialent to Three Minute Warning. The first time I heard it was at a
friend's house and when Bozzio goes nutz there during the outro and then
there was no 'next' song, I went "that's it?" Damn!! :)
Regards,
Jon
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 10:33:46 -0400
From: Frank Benenati <fmb@frontierlogic.com>
To: ytsejam@axnet.net
Subject: Re: Hair metal returns to Cincinnati!!!!!!!
Message-ID: <375FCCCA.47324182@frontierlogic.com>
John Parks wrote:
>
> The icing on the cake though came from two of the most
> perfect women dancing in the row right in front my friend
> and I. All my boyhood fantasies came to life last night,
> seeing two chicks strip (ok so they didn't really strip but
> it was close enough) to the music of Poison. All hail the
> return of Hair Metal!!!
>
It's beginning to look like a perfect world again, isn't it? :)
-mojoman
--
/\ /\
\_\/_/
/ _ _ \
|\ \(*)(*)/ /|
#-----------------OOO- \oo/--OOO------------#
# Frank Benenati - fmb@frontierlogic.com #
# "Some of the nicest people are dogs" #
# - Richard Dean Anderson #
#__________________________ooo______________#
ooo (_)
(_)
------------------------------
Date: Fri, 11 Jun 1999 12:41:02 -0300
From: "Gilberto Bressan Junior" <gbressanjr@sti.com.br>
To: <ytsejam@axnet.net>
Subject: Iron Maiden News - NDTC
Message-ID: <000f01beb420$d157d4e0$1758d3c8@califano>
Iron Maiden has just annouced the producer for their new album...
Kevin Shirley
Let the flames begin...
Gilberto
------------------------------
End of YTSEJAM Digest 4895
**************************
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